Action · Thriller

American Assassin

Seen 30th September

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Why do these movies start with “American” when the country of origin is really non-essential to the plot? Big movies with this title thing include American Pie… then American Psycho… then American Hustle, American Sniper, American Honey, American Gangster, American Mary, American Me, American Pastoral, American Ultra, American Graffiti, American History X, American Satan, American Beauty, American Made, American Wedding, American Pop, American Violence, American Hero, American Reunion, American Fable, American Gigalo, American Heist MY POINT IS ENOUGH WITH CALLING THINGS AMERICAN (NOUN)!… so, American Assassin

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Action · Adventure · Animation · Comedy · Family

The LEGO NINJAGO Movie

Seen September 23rd

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First there was the Lego Movie, and it showed everyone that you could create a piece of art using a licenced toy that was actually good. Then came Lego Batman, which showed you coulde play around in multiple established universes and still tell your own story. Then there was Ninjago… it was a movie.

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Action · Animation · Comedy · Family

Captain Underpants: The First Epic Movie

Seen September 10th

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Earlier today I saw The Emoji Movie, and that made me sad because I worried that kids were being given sub-par family films that were below the standard that they deserved. Fortunately, Captain Underpants came out and all I can do is yell “TRA LA LAAAAAAAAAAAAA”

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Action · Adventure · Fantasy · Horror · Sci-Fi · Western

The Dark Tower

Seen September 2nd

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There is a term in Hollywood known as “Development Hell” where a film that is eagerly anticipated keeps having problems getting started. Sometimes this can hold a film up for years, decades. The Dark Tower has been in development hell since 2007… it may have needed a few extra years to work out all the kinks.

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Action · Comedy

The Hitman’s Bodyguard

Seen 26th August

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Sometimes, a film doesn’t need that much to be a good time. A good script, a decent set of shot choices and a fun story can often make a good film an easy way to kill 90 minutes. What makes it work best is if you can take all these elements and hand it to two insanely charismatic stars who can carry the film and kick it up several notches through sheer force of personality alone… this film found four such stars and thank god for that.

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Action · Adventure · Fantasy · Sci-Fi

Valerian And The City Of A Thousand Planets

Seen 13th August

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For years now, Luc Besson has been known for his visual aesthetic. The man knows how to create a world and breathe life into it, his film The Fifth Element is proof that he knows how to paint a glorious picture with his camera… Valerian And The City Of A Thousand Planets is proof that he needs to work more on his stories and casting because he’s losing his touch.

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